Got my grubby mitts on egosandlies’ wonderful Francesca!
In which PLB is the worst girlfriend ever and only just reads the book her boyfriend man person implored her to read over a year ago, oops.
In short it’s about how we choose depression and anxiety and such as a faulty way to cope with and manipulate a situation/person as a means to gain control when we feel we’ve lost it. The aim is to understand that when you have the option to be depressed and do nothing but contribute to that depression, you also have the option to do something productive instead that will actively make you feel better and regain control. It is not a sickness or illness that was suddenly thrust upon you, it was a series of behaviours that you have learnt and used because you wrongfully thought it would help. It also covers drug addiction, alcoholism, parenting, psychosomatic illnesses, marital problems, all manner of situations that we either take control of or use to try and regain control with.
It’s quite difficult to read as the idea that you’ve chosen the misery that’s ruled your life is almost offensive, but the more you try to understand and absorb, the more sense it makes even if you are not fully embracing the idea. It’s outdated in parts (such as saying heterosexuality is normal whereas homosexuality and paedophilia are painted with the same brush of sexually deviating outside of our inherent need to reproduce, yuckeroo) and paints us all as being inherently manipulative and power hungry beings, but none of that retracts from what is trying to be said, even though it’s a drag. I am personally of the opinion that you’re allowed to think someone has a good idea without having to think all of their ideas are good.
I’m not sure I agree 100% with everything said in this book, but from reviewing my own history with this sort of stuff I can see that you really do rule how you feel about things and what you do to help yourself. Whether or not I agree that I chose my anxiety and that it isn’t a legitimate sickness, I’m not sure yet, but I agree that I encouraged and shaped it into what it is now with poor habits, poor support, and a poor understanding. I am definitely going to refer back to what I have learnt here as it’s really opened my mind and stirred up my own thoughts, which I think is the most important part about learning.
I highly recommend you read it if possible or at least google “control theory” as it may really help you on your journey. My boyfriend man person absolutely swears by it and had taught me much of it already before I snapped it up on eBay for £2.81 so I’ve been surreptitiously implementing it into my life for a while before I knew the full story as it’s worked for well for him, and seemingly now me…
It is really a lot of fun and even for someone as negative an cynical as me, Cassey’s positive attitude just sucks you in and you kind of love her and hate her at the same time :-P
I’m on my 6th month of Blogilates too!
I think that because I didn’t start with weight loss in mind and I was soooooo unfit to start with that as soon as I start to compare myself to anyone else I feel I’m not good enough because my results aren’t very noticeable. I used to look like someone who “took care of themselves” anyway because I’m naturally super thin and carry my weight in my hips/boobs instead of my belly, and although I’m much more shapely now and I have some nice definition, I don’t really look/feel like someone who works out daily and that frustrates me.